By Liv Larsson
This ebook might help make disgrace, guilt and anger your allies rather than our enemies. they could turn into keys for your internal existence and on your desires. studying those emotions can help you larger meet your wishes for appreciate, popularity, belonging and freedom. What will be attainable if you happen to not had to lessen your self to prevent disgrace or guilt?
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Extra info for Anger, Guilt and Shame_ Reclaiming Power and Choice
While thinking about this, I got in touch with what needs were not met then and with the needs I was trying to meet. This brought up a feeling of great sadness. ” If we want to transform shame, it is important to get in touch with the needs that were not met when we did what we are still ashamed of. Then we connect with the needs we were trying to meet in doing what we did. We allow ourselves to feel the feelings that are stimulated when we connect with these needs. When emotions get more space than our evaluations, mourning occurs and this leads to completeness and closure.
Puddle Dancer Press. Shame and Needs Shame is sometimes described as the price we pay for being part of a social context. However, I see that there are other ways to become aware that others’ needs are not being met than to feel shame. If we have continuous connection with our own and others’ needs, we do not need shame as an “alarm signal”. Connection with needs helps us to react before we are overwhelmed by shame. Guilt and Needs A response often heard when I ask people what they need, is that they do not know.
Remember that in the end it is always up to the listener whether they choose to hear what we say as guilt or shame inducing. However, we have the opportunity to make it easier for them not to, and thus strengthen our connection with them. Communication That Often Leads to Shame and Guilt Expressing what I feel without requesting something of the other; I feel so lonely. Connecting what I feel with what someone else has done: I feel sorry because you ... Suggesting that someone should do something without requesting it: Nobody cares anyway.
Anger, Guilt and Shame_ Reclaiming Power and Choice by Liv Larsson